BFD
THE BARTHOLOMEW FIELD DECORATION (BFD)
The Bartholomew Field Decoration is named after Bill Bartholomew and recognizes Conspicuous Stupidity.
Eligibility: Any person who in public (that is to say, in the presence of any one or more non-initiated non-Slabovian (ie: Enemy) paeple), performs/commits:
a) Any act of conspicuous stupidity considered by the Academy to be unquestioningly, unconscionably, unrelentingly, undeniably, irrevocably, massively, deliberately, vastly, earth-shatteringly, absurdly, ridiculously, stupendously, overwhelmingly, indescribably, unspeakably, uniquely, stupefyingly stupid and original; or
b) Any act of conspicuous stupidity considered by the Academy to be not quite so unquestioningly, unconscionably, unrelentingly, undeniably, irrevocably, massively, deliberately, vastly, earth-shatteringly, absurdly, ridiculously, stupendously, overwhelmingly, indescribably, unspeakably, uniquely, stupefyingly stupid and original, but still fundamentally stupid and in the presence of a vast horde of paeple (as defined above); or
c) For generally consistent, regular, dependable, on-going, continuous, redundant, redundant stupidity. (Note: This includes acts considered by the Academy to be quasi-unquestionably, unconscionably, unrelentingly, undeniably, irrevocably, massively, deliberately, vastly, earth-shatteringly, absurdly, ridiculously, stupendously, overwhelmingly, indescribably, unspeakably, uniquely, stupefyingly stupid and original
Is eligible to receive the Bartholomew Field Decoration.
Designed by the Chancellor and approved by Queen Moneca I in September 1994.
Awarded to:
Bartholomew, Bill (posthumously)